We say we are ready to be with the man we have dreamed of. But are we?

Most of our men have been truly hurt in the past. Hurt from past ralationships and they will bring their shadows with them.

Shadows of fear and loneliness, of being left alone after opening up to us. Are we ready to face their demons, to help them sooth their souls? Or are we going to take it personally? And transform from an angel they first saw to the demon he projects on us?

Even if the past has nothing to do with us, we will bring up their wounds, unless they have completely worked through them. But WHEN do we ever do that? When are we ever through?

When are we blank walls where no one has ever written on us – and erased or corrected a part of the innocence that we once were?

Truth is that we always come with packages. Even if we haven’t had a relationship, we come with wounds of feeling rejected from others. Wounds from our child, wounds from physical, emotional pain and misunderstandings from the past.

If your man opens up to you, are you able to listen? Are you able to help him transform, let go, release, realize that you are not the same? Are you ready?

We don’t live in a fairy tale where our man was the first we ever loved or you were the first he ever loved. That’s an illusion.

Yes, no one is the same, no one has had the same experience as any other And yet… we are the same because we all have had experienced some kind of pain.

That’s why we have the responsability, to work on us as much as we can. So we will be able to start with new love, new hope, new desire and not project our past wounds on new relationships.

It is doable, if we learn to understand where our other half is coming from. It starts with the childhood, continues with growing up and ends where you start with him. The new beginning.

So, if he opens up to you, don’t feel jealousy or envy. Yes, there were other women before you – yes, he was with other women before you. But what is past is past and it is important that you can listen to him without the urge of comparrison.

If a man opens up to you, he longs for your understanding, your kindness, your love – he doesn’t want to feel your anger or jealousy, he opens up because he hopes that you are the one who is the angel he first saw in you and he hopes and wishes that you are not like everyone else – that you are the one he has been dreaming of and waiting for all of his life.

So I ask you one more time, are you ready to take the responsability and be there for the man you dream about and the love you desire?

La Ara